So its Australia day tomorrow = Public holiday!
But instead of feeling happy, I feel sad. And lonely. Oh so lonely! Everyone around me has been talking about hanging out with friends, doing BBQs, etc. My plan, clean room.
I wish I had something to do tonight. So instead, I am home drinking alone. I finally know why people do that. I always found it weird before. But, no.
Before drinking, I walked home crying. Collapsed on my bed. Realized this loneliness was making my thoughts way too loud and feelings way too intense. So I let the feelings overflow through my eyes. I couldn’t contain it in anymore. Then I realized, it was only going to get worse from here. *sigh* So I opened the bottle of red wine that’s been sitting there for way too long. And after half a bottle of flowing red comfort, I can pretend to talk and not feel embarrassed for being so pathetic. Always lonely.
*pouring in more wine* I dont know whats wrong with me either. *sigh… drink more wine*
